You might have heard that Kenny Rogers song The Gambler. You know the one that seeps into your soul and you can’t resist kicking off your shoes, hitching your dress into your undies and boot scooting around like a rat on cocaine on the dance floor to?
Or maybe that’s just me, but yes, that one (I don’t take drugs, the rat on cocaine comment was just painting a picture, but you already knew that)!
Here’s a refresher just in case you had few chardies under the belt last time you heard it:
3rd verse
So I handed him my bottle
And he drank down my last swallow
Then he bummed a cigarette
And asked me for a light
And the night got deathly quiet
And his face lost all expression
He said, “If you’re gonna play the game, boy
You gotta learn to play it right
Chorus
You’ve got to know when to hold ’em
Know when to fold ’em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run
You never count your money
When you’re sittin’ at the table
There’ll be time enough for countin’
When the dealin’s done
So here’s the deal
If you’re following or reading this blog, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to tell me that you are either interested in improving yourself, your life or your business in some way shape or form.
I’m thinking the act of setting and/or attaining goals is no foreign concept. Which will spare me the lecture on the importance of setting goals.
The thing about goals
If you’re gonna play the game, boy (or gal) You gotta learn to play it right
The game about goals
You’ve got to know when to hold ’em (the goals, I’m talkin about, hang onto them even when it’s challenging, you feel like giving up and the shite is hitting the fan)
Know when to fold ’em (still talkin’ bout your goals, toss em in, the ones that aren’t serving you)
Know when to walk away (dem goals, drop them now like a sack of spuds, the old worn out ones)
And know when to run (far far away from those ridiculous, life force sucking goals you keep hanging onto and set new ones, more aligned ones)
You never count your money (or how much you can make from that big idea and that whopper of a business/career goal you set for yourself 5 years ago after your boss pissed you off and you vowed to never work for an A hole like him again. It’s not about the money, it about what you’re trading your life for)
When you’re sittin’ at the table (this is a metaphor for when you are observing your future goal/s from your current limited perspective)
There’ll be time enough for countin’ (counting your dough that is when you fully read this blog post and pick up what I’m puttin down and put into practice what I’m sharing here)
When the dealin’s done (the deal is the goal that you have no idea you are going to set or even achieve but is a shit load better than the ones you are constructing in your head right now, oh so many exciting things to come for you)
Translation as to what just happened
You can set goals until the cows come home, create a vision, break that thing down into tiny little actionable bites, set out to achieve them goals, hang on to dear life to them goals, and think that when some day when reach them goals, the rainbow will come out, daisies will pop up and unicorns will fly out of your arse. So you can do that
or
Take this new approach to your goals
1) Be clear about your vision. What, when, why how (The normal goal stuff)
2) Set goals and create action steps but wear them like a loose fitting garment. In other words, know when to hold em and know when to fold em. Be flexible. It’s not do or die, unless you’re being chased by a lion.
The steps are a general guide not a strict set of rules and can sometimes lead you into unchartered waters.
3) Remember the road to reaching your goals is never really ever an easy one. Just because it’s hard doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be doing it though. But bear in mind the next step..
4) Just because you set the goal doesn’t mean you have to keep it. Many people marry the so-called love of their life to hear the words ‘till death do us part” and 5 years later find themselves in the divorce court.
Sometimes that relationship doesn’t serve you anymore or you set off on a new path in life. Back to goals. Sometimes you gotta break up with your goals, kiss them good bye and set off on a new path and divorce it. You didn’t fail the goal, you just succeeded in knowing what is right for you, knowing when to walk away and knowing when to run.
Heck! How do you know when to hold em, walk away and when to run.
This answer is no easy feat. I’ll give it a crack though, here it is.
Your heart will tell you. Your intuition will guide you, you will just know. Your inner guidance will lead you there (sometimes I also lead my clients there, although I am adamant that they already knew what to do, they just didn’t want to admit it, until I made a cushion for their landing or helped tame that crazy wild mind).
You need to learn to go within, listen to yourself and stop the mind chatter.
The next step will always become clear, although you may not know the next 10 steps. This is why setting strict goals and action steps isn’t always the answer. Sometimes the answer is to shake the etch-a-sketch and create a clean slate for yourself and start from where you are now.
Where you’re sitting at the table right this second.
You won’t believe this
15 + years ago, if I had told myself what I would be doing now I would’ve pissed my pants. I would’ve pissed my pants with laughter, but I also would’ve pissed my pants with fear.
You see 15 + years ago I was a Tafe hairdressing teacher. Today I coach people, business people, kids, people in crisis etc. I teach yoga, I teach people about their minds, their bodies, accessing their true wisdom and worth.
Some of my clients are out their changing the god dam fricking world and I’m their coach, like WTF! People say shit like “you saved my life”, “you helped me move forward in my business”, “I tell people about you all the time”, “you helped me love myself”.
How could 15 years ago, with my limited 15 year ago thinking ever, set a goal that would be truly aligned with what I’m doing right now.
And how could you possibly do that?
Needless to say I had to know when to hold em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away and know when to run. I had to stop counting my money at the table because, shit, sometimes I had no money to count, but I see that I’m getting time for counting cause the dealing hasn’t been done, but it has certainly started.
Where are you at?
Is it time to hold em?
Is it time to fold em?
Is it time to walk away?
or
Is it time to run?
or
Is it time you learned to play the game?
Thanks Kenny for this great song and for the memories..
